Let's just say that i decided to end this one sided love since yesterday.
And far from my expectation, today turns out not that bad. Though i still caught myself thinking about what you are doing for a few times, laughing at your tweets, and writing about you now, which obviously made me think about you again. But the good thing is i don't check on your twitter and facebook profile today, i don't even had the urge to, and i don't feel any hurt feelings when i see you are tweeting with some other girls. One step ahead i guess?
But i won't say that it is easy for me to reach this state, i mean, i had to drown myself with "Gonna Get Over You" by Sara Bareilles for tons of times since yesterday, and reassuring myself as hard as i can that this is the best solution the best ending.
But just a few minutes ago, my ambitious side knocked on my door, and said "You sure with this?" and i am just speechless. So i listen to "gonna get over you" again.
Okay, i know, a part of me, maybe 30% part of me, still finds it hard. I mean, i am always this ambitious and positive thinking girl that somehow most of the time always get what i want. And that 30% part of me still wants me to think positive and believe that my dream will come true, but the 70% part of me thinks that all of this is enough, 3 years and a half of dreaming is more than enough and if he doesn't want me, it's time for me to look for someone who does, or at least enjoy my single life without that pain in the chest feeling that i get everytime you replied my chat with that flat respond, everytime you always says goodbye first, and everytime i saw your tweets, which is about talking to some other girl.
i am tired of thinking, i am tired of getting hurt by my own thoughts.
I may still love you, but it's a different situation now, i won't make you as the main reason of my happiness again, i don't want to only feel happy just because of your smile, just because you mentioned me, just because of seeing you, no, i don't want that anymore. I want to open my eyes and see that there are a lot of things in my life that i can cherish too, and i can feel happy because of those things too, it doesn't always have to be you boy.
"I'll wait for you as long as I can. But, when the time comes I fall for someone else, maybe it's about the time to wake up and have the happiness I deserve" - www.superstellacupcakes.com
oh no, should i be that ambitious girl again? is this quote is the best solution?
why love has to be this hard?
J
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Monday, May 16, 2011
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Song of the day #2
Lyrics ( with Romanization and English) :
只剩下鋼琴陪我站在這裡
Zhi sheng xia gang qin pei wo zhan zai zhe li
There's only the piano left to stand here with me
夢想中屬於我們的婚禮
Meng xiang zhong shu yu wo men de hun li
The marriage between us that I've always dreamt of
卻成了 單人結婚進行曲
Que cheng le chan ren jie hun jin xing qu
Has become the tune of someone walking down the aisle alone
在這場愛情角力的拔河裡 愛我還是愛你
Zai zhe chang ai qing jiao li de ba he li Ai wo hai shi ai ni
In this love tug-of-war, to love me or to love you
你選擇了自己
Ni xuan ze le zi ji
You chose yourself
撒嬌的 可愛的 黏人的 愛哭的
Sa jiao de, ke ai de, nu ren de, ai ku de,
Poutingly, Cutely, Girlishly, Loving to cry
照片裡 曾經的都是你喜歡的
zhao pian li, ceng jing de, dou shi ni xi huan de
All the photos contains memories that you like
如今我還在原地 你卻走回你的記憶
Ru jin wo hai zai yuan di Ni que zou hui ni de ji yi
Till today I'm still at the starting point, but you have already walked back into your memories
你說我愛你太多 就快要把你淹沒
Ni shuo wo ai ni tai duo Jiu kuai yao ba ni yan mo
You said I loved you too much, so much so that it's drowning you
你害怕幸福短暫一秒就崩落
Ni hai pa xing fu duan zhan yi miao jiu beng luo
You're scared that happiness will ebb after only a second
分開是一種解脫 讓你好好的想過
Fen kai shi yi zhong jie tuo Rang ni hao hao de xiang guo
Breaking up is a form of relief; it allows you to think through carefully
我想要的那片天空 你是不是能夠給我
Wo xiang yao de na pian tian kong Ni shi bu shi neng gou gei wo
Can you give me that life that I want
你說我給你太多 卻不能給我什麼
Ni shuo wo gei ni tai duo Jue bu neng gei wo shen me
You said I gave you too much, that you couldn't give me anything
分不清激情 承諾 永恆或迷惑
Fen bu qing qi qing cheng nuo yong heng huo mi huo
Can't tell between fervour, promises, eternity or temptation
愛情是一道傷口
Ai qing shi yi dao shang kou
Love is like a wound
我們各自苦痛
Wo men ge zi ku tong
Let's endure the pain ourselves
沉默是我最後溫柔
Chen mo shi wo zui hou wen rou
What is my final act of gentleness
是因為我太愛你
Shi yin wei wo tai ai ni
Is because I love you too much
只剩下鋼琴陪我站在這裡
zhi sheng xia gang qin pei wo zhan zai zhe li
There's only the violin left to stand here with me
夢想中屬於我們的婚禮
meng xiang zhong shu yu wo men de hun li
The marriage between us that I've always dreamt of
安靜了 在我枕邊的夢裡
an jing le zai wo zhen bian de meng li
Has been silenced in my night-long dream
我知道相愛原本就不容易
wo zhi dao xiang ai yuan ben jiu bu rong yi
I know that mutual love is not easy from the start
愛不是1加1
ai bu shi yi jia yi
Love is not just one plus one
努力就有結局
nu li jiu you jie ju
You won't always get results even if you work hard
撒嬌的 可愛的 黏人的 愛哭的
sa jiao de ke ai de nian ren de ai ku de
Poutingly, Cutely, Girlishly, Loving to cry
照片裡 曾經的都是愛著你的
zhao pian li ceng jing de dou shi ai zhe ni de
From all the photos we've taken it can be seen how much I once loved you
臉頰的淚還溫熱 卻沒有人握我的手
lian jia de lei hai wen re que mei you ren wo wo de shou
The tears on my cheeks are still warm, yet there's no one holding my hand
你說我愛你太多 就快要把你淹沒
Ni shuo wo ai ni tai duo Jiu kuai yao ba ni yan mo
You said I loved you too much, so much so that it's drowning you
你害怕幸福短暫一秒就崩落
Ni hai pa xing fu duan zhan yi miao jiu beng luo
You're scared that happiness will ebb after only a second
分開是一種解脫 讓你好好的想過
Fen kai shi yi zhong jie tuo Rang ni hao hao de xiang guo
Breaking up is a form of relief; it allows you to think through carefully
我想要的那片天空 你是不是能夠給我
Wo xiang yao de na pian tian kong Ni shi bu shi neng gou gei wo
Can you give me that life that I want
你說我給你太多 卻不能給我什麼
Ni shuo wo gei ni tai duo Jue bu neng gei wo shen me
You said I gave you too much, that you couldn't give me anything
分不清激情 承諾 永恆或迷惑
Fen bu qing qi qing cheng nuo yong heng huo mi huo
Can't tell between fervour, promises, eternity or temptation
愛情是一道傷口
Ai qing shi yi dao shang kou
Love is like a wound
我們各自苦痛
Wo men ge zi ku tong
Let's endure the pain ourselves
沉默是我最後溫柔
Chen mo shi wo zui hou wen rou
What is my final act of gentleness
是因為我太愛你
Shi yin wei wo tai ai ni
Is because I love you too much
note : such a touching song, almost cried while i'm listening to the song, reading the lyrics and thinking of you..
Realization
Today, i came to a point where i feel like somehow, as long as you're happy, i'm fine with it. and the rest of my feeling is like a battlefield. a war is going on inside my heart, whether to let you go, or keep on waiting. but when i thought of giving up, i don't know why, out of a sudden, tears started to burst out from my eyes. but when i thought of keep on waiting, my brain told me that no matter how hard i try, you are always like that, flat. and now, i don't even know which hurts me more. i am really clueless about this thing called 'love'.
J
J
Saturday, May 14, 2011
Song of the day
since it's holiday, and i apparently have nothing to do beside drowning myself in the internet world, i am going to make a new label called 'Song of the day" ! yay!
okay, maybe i am not going to post it everyday, but at least, i'll try to post it evertime i found a catchy song that makes my day :)
here it goes *drumrolls*
Lyrics :
okay, maybe i am not going to post it everyday, but at least, i'll try to post it evertime i found a catchy song that makes my day :)
here it goes *drumrolls*
Lyrics :
Berdebar rasa di dada setiap kau tatap mataku
Apakah arti pandangan itu menunjukkan hasratmu
Sungguh aku telah tergoda saat kau dekat denganku
Hanya kau yang membuatku begini
Melepas panah asmara
Reff:
Sudah katakan cinta sudah kubilang sayang
Namun kau hanya diam tersenyum kepadaku
Kau buat aku bimbang kau buat aku gelisah
Ingin rasanya kau jadi milikku
Ku akan setia menunggu satu kata yang terucap
Dari isi hati sanubarimu yang membuatku bahagia
Sungguh aku telah tergoda saat kau dekat denganku
Hanya kau yang membuatku begini
Melepas panah asmara
Back to Reff:
Panah asmara panah asmara panah asmara
Back to Reff:
Kau buat aku bimbang kau buat aku gelisah
Ingin rasanya kau jadi milikku
Kau buat aku bimbang kau buat aku gelisah
Ingin rasanya kau jadi milikku
http://hotliriklagu.com
Panah asmara panah asmara panah asmara
i am ready !
i don't know how to write it out, so let me just go to the point
i am accepted at LASALLE College of the Arts, Singapore! and being offered Tuition Grant! HA!
this is supercalifragilisticispialidocious!
i am one step closer to my dream!
and i'll never forget how fast my heart beats when i called synergy about the result.
also, mommy said i can go to singapore if i can find a place to stay with a reasonable price.
so currently i was browsing a bunch of hostels sites and accomodation sites, sending email for inquiry,yeah, those kinda stuffs. Looking for a nice and safe hostel/flatts with affordable price for sure.
oh yeah, if anyone happens to read this post and have any info about a place to stay in singapore, contact me please!
thankies ;)
i am accepted at LASALLE College of the Arts, Singapore! and being offered Tuition Grant! HA!
this is supercalifragilisticispialidocious!
i am one step closer to my dream!
and i'll never forget how fast my heart beats when i called synergy about the result.
also, mommy said i can go to singapore if i can find a place to stay with a reasonable price.
so currently i was browsing a bunch of hostels sites and accomodation sites, sending email for inquiry,yeah, those kinda stuffs. Looking for a nice and safe hostel/flatts with affordable price for sure.
oh yeah, if anyone happens to read this post and have any info about a place to stay in singapore, contact me please!
thankies ;)
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Dear someone
"dear someone
there's someone out there who still keep all of the captures of your smile, and look at them in the middle of night when she misses you. there's someone that secretly checking out your updates not because of stalking, but that's the only way to know how you are doing. there's someone that wishes she could be there spending whole day and night, helping you do your work. there's someone that barely breathe when accidentally bumped into each other. there's someone that still remember the first sweet smile from you. there's someone that trying hard to look fine when she heard about the new girl. there's someone that keep thinking about "if only". there's someone that keep repeating the song you played on your car. there's someone who will choose you, than anything else in the world. there's someone that wishes she could take care of you or tell you "get well soon" when you're sick. there's someone who might have been assumed as a horrible bitch for you, just because she tried every possible ways to move on from that sweet little memories. there's someone that will go with you wherever you wanted to go. there's someone that loves her birthday because it's the only day she will get a short text from you. there's someone that could not help herself to erase this little hope that one day she'll be as special again as she used to be.
with love,
someone"
Okay, so just to make it clear, that quote up there is taken from www.superstellacupcakes.blogspot.com
I'm not a friend of her, and all i know about her is that she used to model while she is in Medan, and she is a pretty awesome model to me and she is currently staying in Australia.
I don't know why i love that quote so much that i decided to post it here and i know her story is different from mine, but i do those things in that quote that she wrote. So somehow i feel that the quote can express my feeling too, maybe that's why.
Feeling so up and down lately, and i don't even know why.
Too much things to be thought about, i guess i'll gone mad if i keep thinking about it.
J
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Someday we'll know
feel like blogging, but i don't know what to write. perhaps i just want to share.currently,feeling so random. don't even know what to write. #screams
"two years or later, will you still be on my mind?"
blame the novel that i just read.
blame the novel that i just read.
"so many questions, i need an answer"
blame my heart.
blame my heart.
"why i wasn't meant for you?"
blame my thoughts.
yes, i am jealous
duh, like i never experienced it before. yeah, i think, i don't even have the right to feel jealous, i mean, i am nobody and i know it's the risk of loving someone but not telling that someone. (okay, what the hell i'm writing here?) well, he has the right to talk to anyone, anyway he wants it and, he is a friendly guy.. so what the hell i have to feel jealous about? aggh....
I’ll get better, after a few tunes, after a few days, after a few tears. I’ll be better. because i am so good at pushing myself down and pulling myself up again in the end.
signing off,
J
yes, i am jealous
duh, like i never experienced it before. yeah, i think, i don't even have the right to feel jealous, i mean, i am nobody and i know it's the risk of loving someone but not telling that someone. (okay, what the hell i'm writing here?) well, he has the right to talk to anyone, anyway he wants it and, he is a friendly guy.. so what the hell i have to feel jealous about? aggh....
I’ll get better, after a few tunes, after a few days, after a few tears. I’ll be better. because i am so good at pushing myself down and pulling myself up again in the end.
signing off,
J
Saturday, May 7, 2011
Perhaps you
Just finished reading this!
what do i think about this novel?
i am a bit disappointed though, because the reason i bought this book is because i think the synopsis is kinda like my 'love' story but eventually the writer seems like sort of distracted and it turned out to be more of another story instead, the story of a girl who became someone's-how do you say it in english?-selingkuhan.
well, in the end she reunited with her first love-thank God-because if not, i will say that i really regret buying this novel. The only thing that i dislike is that the writer wrote too little about how the main lead, got together with her first love somehow.
But, at least reading is still better than doing nothing, and since i had finished reading this book, now i have no idea what to do again. Crap.
anyway, i wanna tell a lil funny story about how i bought this book. so actually, i know that this book is not yet published, but i ask the bookstore's staff about this book, well, i don't hope to buy it anyway, since i'm pretty sure it was not available for sale yet, and the computer in the bookstore stated that this book will be for sale on 10th may. but suddenly, the bookstore's staff came back, and and gave me this book! i don't know where on earth did he got this, probably the storeroom though, i mean, the book doesn't even had any price tag on it!
so it's pretty awesome i guess, maybe i am the first buyer in medan? :p
lol
"Tak tahukah kau seperih apa perasaan hati yang tak berbalas? Menanti sesuatu yang tak kunjung datang? Hari berganti hari, tetapi arahku tak pernah berubah-selalu tertuju kepadamu. Aku tak pernah jenuh menunggu.. menunggu untuk kau cintai. Namun, kau hanya menganggapku lalu. Seperti tak kasat mata aku bagimu. Terkadang lelah menyuruhku menyerah, memintaku berhenti melakukan perbuatan sia - sia dan mulai mencari cinta baru. Namun, bagaimana mungkin aku sanggup melakukannya, kalau semua tentangmu mengikuti seperti bayangan menempel di bawah kakiku? Dan bagaimana pula caranya membakar habis semua rindu yang bertahun - tahun mengendap di hatiku? Aku berharap mendapatkan jawaban darimu. Namun, kau tetap membisu, membuatku lebih lama menunggu." Perhaps you ; a novel by Stephanie Zen
those are the synopsis. Now you know why i fell in love "at the first read" with this novel right? :)
what do i think about this novel?i am a bit disappointed though, because the reason i bought this book is because i think the synopsis is kinda like my 'love' story but eventually the writer seems like sort of distracted and it turned out to be more of another story instead, the story of a girl who became someone's-how do you say it in english?-selingkuhan.
well, in the end she reunited with her first love-thank God-because if not, i will say that i really regret buying this novel. The only thing that i dislike is that the writer wrote too little about how the main lead, got together with her first love somehow.
But, at least reading is still better than doing nothing, and since i had finished reading this book, now i have no idea what to do again. Crap.
anyway, i wanna tell a lil funny story about how i bought this book. so actually, i know that this book is not yet published, but i ask the bookstore's staff about this book, well, i don't hope to buy it anyway, since i'm pretty sure it was not available for sale yet, and the computer in the bookstore stated that this book will be for sale on 10th may. but suddenly, the bookstore's staff came back, and and gave me this book! i don't know where on earth did he got this, probably the storeroom though, i mean, the book doesn't even had any price tag on it!
so it's pretty awesome i guess, maybe i am the first buyer in medan? :p
lol
"Tak tahukah kau seperih apa perasaan hati yang tak berbalas? Menanti sesuatu yang tak kunjung datang? Hari berganti hari, tetapi arahku tak pernah berubah-selalu tertuju kepadamu. Aku tak pernah jenuh menunggu.. menunggu untuk kau cintai. Namun, kau hanya menganggapku lalu. Seperti tak kasat mata aku bagimu. Terkadang lelah menyuruhku menyerah, memintaku berhenti melakukan perbuatan sia - sia dan mulai mencari cinta baru. Namun, bagaimana mungkin aku sanggup melakukannya, kalau semua tentangmu mengikuti seperti bayangan menempel di bawah kakiku? Dan bagaimana pula caranya membakar habis semua rindu yang bertahun - tahun mengendap di hatiku? Aku berharap mendapatkan jawaban darimu. Namun, kau tetap membisu, membuatku lebih lama menunggu." Perhaps you ; a novel by Stephanie Zen
those are the synopsis. Now you know why i fell in love "at the first read" with this novel right? :)
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
my plans
stressed out, still
i just try to not think about it that much and i have a few "plans" to do regarding to my problems.
so first of all, i'll apply to binus university, which is located in jakarta, taking interior design or creative advertising or communication visual design. (will decide later after a few more browsing about these majors) then i'll have to go to the eye doctor, for the eye test i guess... tomorrow or the day after tomorrow then.
then, if i got the TGD offer from Lasalle, i'll try to discuss it with my parents about letting me go to singapore to continue my study, i'll search for the good but cheapest hostel that i can find and i'll try to spend as lil' money as i can, i'll find part time job (hopefully in a book store) cause i don't think working in a fast food restaurant suits me (--") and, i'll try to get signed in an agency which can give me modeling jobs that fits my timetable. i'll build my life from down and make myself success, in everything that i do, after i got my diploma, i'll work first so then i can pay my bachelor degree study fees by myself.
if i don't get TGD? i'll go to jakarta, without any hatred feelings. i'll study and work there and continue my bachelor degree study in singapore (with my own money of course :) ) or another option, apply to singapore again next year but still, for the time being i'll study in jakarta.
so far, that's the only possible plan that i can think of.
wish me luck
i really want tgd :(
i just try to not think about it that much and i have a few "plans" to do regarding to my problems.
so first of all, i'll apply to binus university, which is located in jakarta, taking interior design or creative advertising or communication visual design. (will decide later after a few more browsing about these majors) then i'll have to go to the eye doctor, for the eye test i guess... tomorrow or the day after tomorrow then.
then, if i got the TGD offer from Lasalle, i'll try to discuss it with my parents about letting me go to singapore to continue my study, i'll search for the good but cheapest hostel that i can find and i'll try to spend as lil' money as i can, i'll find part time job (hopefully in a book store) cause i don't think working in a fast food restaurant suits me (--") and, i'll try to get signed in an agency which can give me modeling jobs that fits my timetable. i'll build my life from down and make myself success, in everything that i do, after i got my diploma, i'll work first so then i can pay my bachelor degree study fees by myself.
if i don't get TGD? i'll go to jakarta, without any hatred feelings. i'll study and work there and continue my bachelor degree study in singapore (with my own money of course :) ) or another option, apply to singapore again next year but still, for the time being i'll study in jakarta.
so far, that's the only possible plan that i can think of.
wish me luck
i really want tgd :(
so here i am, still feeling stressed out. left my tv on, just to not make my room feel so quiet. i wish things will work out like how i want it to be. i wish i can continue my study in singapore. i wish i can go to Lasalle. i wish i can take interior design major. i wish i can be a great designer. i wish i can work part time in a book store. i wish i can get signed by a modelling agency in singapore. i wish i can meet you accidentally someday. i wish i can talk to you normally. i wish i can make you smile. i wish you can feel the same way as how i feel for you.
wouldn't it be so perfect...?
wouldn't it be so perfect...?
currently : stressed out X(
i am so stressed out with all of this college/university matters.
i want to continue my study in singapore. not because he also studies there, no, i am not that silly, i want to continue my study there, because i love singapore, i want to go there since i am still in primary school, and currently my situation is so devastating, all this family matters and money matters too, argh...
can't i just live my life like how i dream it would be? can't i continue my study in singapore , taking interior design major?
oh i am willing to live in small room, eat two times a day, i am willing to live far away from the word comfortable, as long as i can continue my study there.
no, i don't want jakarta, i don't want bandung, i don't want medan, i don't want graphic design, i don't want accounting!
call me selfish, call me childish,
i just want to fight for my dream
i want to continue my study in singapore. not because he also studies there, no, i am not that silly, i want to continue my study there, because i love singapore, i want to go there since i am still in primary school, and currently my situation is so devastating, all this family matters and money matters too, argh...
can't i just live my life like how i dream it would be? can't i continue my study in singapore , taking interior design major?
oh i am willing to live in small room, eat two times a day, i am willing to live far away from the word comfortable, as long as i can continue my study there.
no, i don't want jakarta, i don't want bandung, i don't want medan, i don't want graphic design, i don't want accounting!
call me selfish, call me childish,
i just want to fight for my dream
Monday, May 2, 2011
so random
i am back. 12 o'clock currently. all i can hear from the tv is about osama's death. haven't had any breakfast, let alone lunch. couldn't remember my dream last night, though i am pretty sure there's you in it. my mind is full of you, still. woke up and check twitter to find out that you are going somewhere out from this town. wishing you had a great flight, but i can't since i am pretty sure when i woke up and saw your tweets, you might probably already arrived --". damn.
alright, i guess i am gonna go grab sth for lunch now, my stomach is grumbling like hell.
c y,
jesslyn
P.S : so happy suddenly, XD
alright, i guess i am gonna go grab sth for lunch now, my stomach is grumbling like hell.
c y,
jesslyn
P.S : so happy suddenly, XD
baby i was born this way
don't get it wrong, this post got nothing to do with lady gaga's hit.
well practically it's almost 3 in the morning so i'll make this post quite a snap, wait, probably not, depends on my mood too i guess. oh well, i'll just write what's on my mind.
1) i done my National Exam
yes, my 3rd year of HS is over, senior high school is over, school is over ! happy? not really. Sad? not really. idk? well, likely. i kinda wish the school still obliged us to go to school after the NE cause i am bored stiff during the holiday. I dunno what to do, and getting a work is not a great idea i guess, since i'm not going to further my study in my hometown, so there will be no workplace that would recruit someone who is only going to work for 2 or 3 months. can someone tell me what to do beside browsing,chatting,watching tv,listening to music,tweeting,eating and sleeping? (okay, i was like, 'pig in making' , my bad) yes, i do go out with my friends, but i can't do that everyday somehow.
2) i done my interview
i am waiting for my interview result, which will be sent via email on the middle of may. i really wish i can get the Tuition Grant #fingerscrossed. because studying and living in singapore had always been my dream and i believe i had wrote it here for a few times already too. the interview? it was quite good, it was fun , especially the discussion part, i had good times and mind cracking times as well, and i believe that i did a pretty good job, not being over confident though. just want to think positive.
anyway, thanks for everyone who wished me luck before the interview! i appreciate it a lot! thanks for being my mood booster :)
3) i went to prom
my school prom? urmm... how to describe it.. it was... so fast i couldn't even remember what i done that time. yeah, that's it. i wish i could experience it for one more time, really. :(
what i remember the most is that i really regret of not giving him that damn flower.
4) i talked about my feelings to a friend of mine
well, at first i never thought that i am going to talk about my feelings to this friend of mine, but maybe i was so depressed about that damn prom flower 'til i thought that maybe it was a great idea to ask some opinion from this friend of mine. so yeah, i end up telling him my pathetic love story. well, this friend of mine gave a few opinions that's actually been inside of my mind for quite a long time too, and some opinions that i think quite helpful. but really, maybe the part about 'telling him about the way i feel towards him' should be postponed still, sorry.
thanks so much for listening anyway :)
that's all i guess. i really need to get some sleep and go find something more interesting to do. lol
sincerely,
jesslyn
well practically it's almost 3 in the morning so i'll make this post quite a snap, wait, probably not, depends on my mood too i guess. oh well, i'll just write what's on my mind.
1) i done my National Exam
yes, my 3rd year of HS is over, senior high school is over, school is over ! happy? not really. Sad? not really. idk? well, likely. i kinda wish the school still obliged us to go to school after the NE cause i am bored stiff during the holiday. I dunno what to do, and getting a work is not a great idea i guess, since i'm not going to further my study in my hometown, so there will be no workplace that would recruit someone who is only going to work for 2 or 3 months. can someone tell me what to do beside browsing,chatting,watching tv,listening to music,tweeting,eating and sleeping? (okay, i was like, 'pig in making' , my bad) yes, i do go out with my friends, but i can't do that everyday somehow.
2) i done my interview
i am waiting for my interview result, which will be sent via email on the middle of may. i really wish i can get the Tuition Grant #fingerscrossed. because studying and living in singapore had always been my dream and i believe i had wrote it here for a few times already too. the interview? it was quite good, it was fun , especially the discussion part, i had good times and mind cracking times as well, and i believe that i did a pretty good job, not being over confident though. just want to think positive.
anyway, thanks for everyone who wished me luck before the interview! i appreciate it a lot! thanks for being my mood booster :)
3) i went to prom
my school prom? urmm... how to describe it.. it was... so fast i couldn't even remember what i done that time. yeah, that's it. i wish i could experience it for one more time, really. :(
what i remember the most is that i really regret of not giving him that damn flower.
4) i talked about my feelings to a friend of mine
well, at first i never thought that i am going to talk about my feelings to this friend of mine, but maybe i was so depressed about that damn prom flower 'til i thought that maybe it was a great idea to ask some opinion from this friend of mine. so yeah, i end up telling him my pathetic love story. well, this friend of mine gave a few opinions that's actually been inside of my mind for quite a long time too, and some opinions that i think quite helpful. but really, maybe the part about 'telling him about the way i feel towards him' should be postponed still, sorry.
thanks so much for listening anyway :)
that's all i guess. i really need to get some sleep and go find something more interesting to do. lol
sincerely,
jesslyn
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)